ALTERATED SPRITE

BY JOSEPH BELOTTE

Bumper guards don't always work! Notice pictures of Sprite on this page*. It can be easily seen therefore that some new design could be necessary to improve the quality of the Austin Healey Sprite body.

Some small damage to the rear of the Sprite just past the center of the Delaware Memorial Bridge on the route to Washington immediately suggested a new design for the front end. Driver was sitting there waiting for the traffic to move when he was suddenly hit by a great idea. Not only was the idea great, but it was grating. He heard the shrill screech of brakes behind him, a terrific crash followed by another loud crash, and, as he noted a sudden un-planned-on firmness of the pressure of the Sprite bucket seat against his back, throwing him forward, he decided that perhaps his body work would soon use a good overhaul. And by the time his face hit the steering wheel it had had one. Evidently a great aesthetic imbalance was caused by the pushed in rear. Nature immediately adjusted itself so as to make the front of the car match.

The driver claims, however, that he is not satisfied with this new and very swift method of redesigning bodywork. He says quite seriously that he doesn't agree with the design. Maybe he plans on trying again.

One thing that the driver, Warren Bogardus of the Washington Region of the Austin Healey Club of America, does agree with, however, is the efficient and helpful service of the Delaware Memorial Bridge Police. (At least when you are not at fault, he adds.) They took full responsibility for the autos and the victims, hauling the cars off to where they could be serviced and the victims off to the hospital for examination. They even went as far as to drive the stranded drivers to the proper location for catching a bus to their intended destination.

The accident was a memorial one. What else could it have been on the Delaware Memorial Bridge. A woman driver (no offense ladies) drove her Cadillac into a Mercury, driving the Mercury into the Sprite, and the Sprite into a Chevrolet, demonstrating what we could call the ultimate in back seat driving. The Merc, the Sprite and the Chevy were all stopped at the time.

It may seem to you that we are taking this accident rather lightly. Well, I have decided that as things happened we have to laugh at it, because if that Mercury had not been between the Cadillac and the Sprite it would have been far other than a laughing matter. Dangerous driving is not funny. What is funny is that sometimes people come out of accidents alright. Let's get people to drive just a little safer and we won't have to laugh off near disaster.

1. *Sorry, picture quality not adequate for scanning. Both the front and rear of the car were thoroughly smashed in.